


The Gang solves the apocalypse situation

by Theriverthewoods



Category: IASIP, It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia, always sunny in philadelphia, fxx
Genre: Blood, Elevators, F/M, Gen, Horror, Profanity, Violence, Zombie AU, Zombies, apoalypse au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-08-08
Updated: 2018-08-08
Packaged: 2019-06-23 18:31:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,371
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15612378
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Theriverthewoods/pseuds/Theriverthewoods
Summary: They had seen people getting rescued by helicopter on the news and had come here to try to hitch/bribe/threaten/get a ride. Unfortunately, a lot of other people had the same idea. Too many people had shown up. Someone in the crowd had been infected already and went crazy, turning almost everybody else. The helicopter crashed and Charlie and Dee had somehow managed to escape and hide in a broom-closet.Charlie was sweating.I don’t know how much of this I’ll write but in this chapter it’s just Charlie and Dee trying to escape some zombos in Philly.They’re in a rather tall building.Also it’s the apocalypse.





	The Gang solves the apocalypse situation

**Author's Note:**

> Hey this is really just for fun! I’ve always thought this AU was neat but have never really seen anyone do anything with it so I thought I might. 
> 
> Also I enjoy Chardee! If I do more chapters there will prObably be other romances between other characters. ;)

“Fuck fuck! They’re coming up the stairs!” Charlie shouted, standing on his toes to look out the tiny window in the door. He clutched his faithful rat-stick in his hands, still grimy and crusted with old blood. 

Dee jumped to her feet, scooping up her bag. 

“M-maybe they’ll just pass us by?” She said nervously.

“Dee are you stupid?" Charlie hissed.  "I know their kind, they’re like rats... they’ll smell us from a mile away...” he said, slipping into his pseudo-Scottish "jaws monologue" voice. He gripped his rat-basher tighter.

“Are you serious Charlie?? What do you possibly know about zombies!”

Charlie spun around, “Just trust me on this Dee! I know I’m right.” He urged.  
“Well Shit Charlie where are we gonna go?”  
“I don’t know Dee! I don’t know!” He said, “holstering” his rat-stick by shoving it through the mesh water-bottel holder on his backpack and frantically looking around for anything to use. He grabbed the thick wooden shelf to his left and pulled it over, blockading the doorway as well as he could.   
“We can’t get down from this goddamn floor without using the stairs!” Dee cried.  
“I know, I know! Just shut up and let me think!” Charlie said, bringing his hands up to run through his hair, already irredeemably disheveled. 

“hmmm....” he frantically thought, mumbling through his clenched jaw. “What about the elevator?” He said, releasing his hair and raising his head to look at Dee.

Dee frowned and crossed her arms “are you serious Charlie? It’s down the hall, past the staircase, and if the condition of this building is any indication it probably doesn’t work!”

“Dee it’s our only option! We’re in a closet! We can make it through a  _few_  zombies” Charlie said.

“A  _few_. Charlie there were at  _least_ a hundred people up there when all hell broke loose. Plus who knows how many still coming up were caught in the staircase”

“Well probably a lot of the zombies have gone down the stairs by now”

“I thought you said they could ‘smell is from a mile away’” Dee asked, incredulous. 

“Hnnng...” Charlie grumbled through gritted teeth. “Well now you’re just...”

“What, Charlie!”

Charlie squinted his eyes at Dee “...you’re just using my knowledge for the wrong reasons...”

“No, Charlie that doesn’t even make sense”

“Ok whatever!” Charlie screeched, on edge and frustrated. He took a deep breath and looked at Dee. “Dee this is our only option. Unless you wanna die in a closet!”

“Like Hell, I’m not Mac” Dee said, glaring down at Charlie. 

Charlie broke into a grin.

She smiled.

They both looked to the door. 

“I don’t hear anything outside” Charlie murmured.

Dee slung her bag securely over her shoulder and picked up Charlie’s garbage-dump-sword, gripping it tightly. The garbage-sword and rat stick were some of the only weapons the two of them managed to pack before stumbling out on this ill-fated adventure. 

“Let’s just get this over with” Dee murmured, reaching for the door-handle. 

Dee held the door securely closed while Charlie, grunting, shoved his make-shift barricade out of the way. 

Finally they each took a deep breath, and looked at each other one last time.

“You ready?” Charlie asked

“Yeah Charlie”

They both leaned it, sharing a last brief, grimy kiss, for good luck.  
Then Charlie raised his foot and kicked the door open.

Charlie swung left and right with his rat stick, taking out zombies which tripped and stumbled over each other. There were about twenty of them on the landing, and more down the stairs. While they shambled pretty slowly, it was a high concentration in an enclosed space, and Charlie and Dee had no time to waste. The elevator was only fifteen yards away, but it was a fight to the death to get there.  
Dee used her fear to her advantage, letting adrenaline take over as she slashed at the zombies with her sword. She and Charlie were side by side as they fought. Slowly they began to edge their way forward down the hall.  
Charlie was blindly bashing the zombies, screaming all the while, not out of fear, but due to his multitudes of unconscious pent-up anxiety. He followed behind Dee who pushed forwards, protecting her from behind. They both had to trust that the other was alright.

Finally they made it to the elevator doors. Dee slammed the "down" button, praying harder than she'd ever prayed that the damn thing worked. The button did nothing.  
Charlie was the only one fighting as Dee screamed at the elevator. He, too, was running on adrenaline alone, already exhausted from the trek up to the highest floor of the building. They had seen people getting rescued by helicopter on the news and had come here to try to hitch/bribe/threaten/get a ride. Unfortunately, a lot of other people had the same idea. Too many people had shown up. Someone in the crowd had been infected already and went crazy, turning almost everybody else. The helicopter crashed and Charlie and Dee had somehow managed to escape and hide in a broom-closet.  
Charlie was sweating.  
"Dee??" He screamed behind him.  
"The goddamn button isn't doing anything! It isn't lighting up!"  
"Well try again!" He shouted  
"What do you think I'm doing you idiot!"  
Dee frantically looked at the elevator doors, pressing the button over and over again. If this didn't work then she and Charlie were definitely dead.   
She pressed the button again and again until it finally lit up bright blue. Dee shrieked in triumph. Under Charlie's screams and the general pandemonium all around she could make out the faint hum of the elevator coming to life from some floor below.    
"What?" Charlie shouted, glancing behind him.  
"It's blue, it's lit up, the elevator is coming!" Dee cried.  
She grabbed her sword and swung around to Charlie's side, hacking at a zombie coming at him.   
They fought in silence until finally they heard a gentle  
*ding*  
from behind.  
"It's here!" Dee said,

They heard the elevator doors slide open with a metallic grind. Dee hacked her way through her last zombie and then leapt into the elevator. Charlie glanced behind himself and then finished bashing his zombie into the ground before spinning around.  Dee was frantically pressing the button of the lowest floor, which was again, not lighting up, when Charlie slipped on a pool of blood and fell hard on his face. 

"Fuck, Charlie!" Dee yelled, reaching her arm out to pull Charlie up. 

But before she could grab his hand, the zombie that Charlie had bashed into the ground wrapped its fingers around his ankle, and pulled back. 

"Ahhhh! Fuck! Dee!" Charlie screamed as the zombie dragged him backwards. 

"Charlie!" Dee lunged forwards towards him, her arm outstretched. 

"Deeeeeee!"

but the old elevator brought its door closed on her fingers.

_Tall and tan and young and lovely_

_The girl from Ipanema goes walking_

_And when she passes, each one she passes goes - ah  
_ (Some catchy Muzak was playing in the elevator, a gentle bossa-nova - Though it did little to improve the current atmosphere) 

"Aaah!" Dee screeched, yanking her fingers from between the doors. They were throbbing like hell. Dee ignored them and threw herself at the elevator doors, pounding her fists and shouting Charlie's name. No matter how many times she pressed the "door open" button it would not light up. Finally she grabbed the sword, sliding it between the doors to try and pry them open, but it wasn't built to be used as a crowbar, and snapped. Plus, Charlie had found it in the trash, so maybe it wasn't the highest quality sword to begin with... 

Dee stepped back from the door to think when her eyes caught the control panel on the wall beside the doors. The lowest floor button had finally lit up. 

"no, no, no, no don't go  _now"_ Dee groaned, rushing over to the control panel.

But as she went the elevator lurched with a sickening *THUNK*, tossing her towards the wall. 

Dee grabbed the hand-rail, suddenly frozen stiff with dread. 

And the elevator lurched again, dropping a few feet.

"Noooo.... come on... please elevator _please.."_ Dee whispered, her eyes wide.

And the elevator fell. 


End file.
